“A full loyalty to the leader merely fits the dogs, not to the humans!” ― Mehmet Murat ildan
In the past, political campaign periods in Nigeria used to be time to look up to usually because of the fun, humour, and jokes that would come with political campaigns. Politicians of those days belonged to a happy breed….it was always a time to relish. New vocabularies were learnt with the accompanying funny punchlines. One could easily recall the varying jokes of different characters, Nnamdi Azikiwe’s tintinnabulations of wit and grammar and proverbs, Ahmadu Bello’s straight talk but punchy native intelligence, Obafemi Awolowo’s pragmatic approach to issues, Aminu Kano’s unrelenting populist cries, and Waziri Ibrahim’s politics without bitterness.
Lately, one could recall the likes of Bola Ige, Abubakar Rimi, Sam Mbakwe, and the emancipator Solomon Lar, among others, in their class using fine words to deliver their messages to the electorate. The late MKO Abiola’s catchy idioms and proverbs came out vividly during the 1993 presidential campaign. During this era, even if they wanted to abuse, it was usually wittily done devoid of caustics.
The comical nature of campaigns then whittled down the acrimony and bitterness, as the campaigns were characterised by creative verbal humour. Then, political campaigns were hilarious and entertaining. You would watch television during campaigns to relax your nerves and laugh off your stress with their jokes. All that changed in 2015 through one man called Lai Mohammad who entered the stage and dispirited the political campaigns, replacing wits with fabrications and the attack-dog mentality.
Ordinarily, spokespersons of political campaigns and or politicians are meant to herald the good qualities of their party or the flag bearers. Over time, particularly since 2015, spokespersons have assumed a new responsibility. They have become blatant attack dogs, who tell lies and say unsubstantiated and unprintable things as a way of defending, shielding, and or marketing their paymasters.
Attack dogs’ main goal is to protect and shield their owners. In the political space, attack dogs are usually persons noted for caustic or harsh, personal, and usually public attacks against opponents. They are usually hired and like the “kept man” perform fanatical attack roles for and about the ones keeping them. In defending their principals, they break rules so long as what they say hurts perceived political rivals. These are the characters already listed to be let loose by the two leading political parties, the APC and the PDP, ahead of 2023. They are spoiling the fun that campaigns used to bring.
In other climes, the position is supposed to be for trained journalists or public relations experts who will know how to package things well for public attention. But since the 2015 general elections, the job is no longer for media practitioners; the job has been hijacked by the so-called political attack dogs. The qualifications for the job are no longer based on expertise, experience, and or ability to be persuasive. What is needed for the position now is the ability to be bullish, and concoct lies that look like the truth. Ability to throw stones at enemies’ homes and expect a response so that the whole place will be charged.
Their effectiveness is measured by the number of upsets they can cause in opponents’ camps without regard to whether what is said is true or not. Their job receives accolades when the opponents are bitter and complaining. They work without regard to the laws of libel and defamation because such knowledge inhibits that quarrelsome disposition. They believe also that more funds are attracted by their ability to provoke and charge the stage. Lawyers more than media practitioners have been found more dutiful for the new vogue.
It all started with a lawyer called Lai Mohammad who could lie without batting an eyelid. This man could be pointing at the sea and calling it rock without feeling anything. He was such a suitable attack dog who shielded his principal to the extent that he was an able buckler to General Muhammadu Buhari…a role that fetched him the Minister of Information for seven years now. Lai Mohammad did all the talking during campaigns and successfully shielded Buhari.
When Nigerians tried to hold the President accountable they discovered that he did not say or promise anything during the campaign because he was adequately shielded. He was not there for any media chat or presidential debate.
It was a response to the Lai Mohammad and APC style that forced President Goodluck Jonathan to abandon his professional spokespersons and went for an able attack dog and lawyer, Chief Femi Fani-Kayode (FFK), in 2015. As these attack dogs engaged themselves in the fight, germane issues took flight and left the space for backbiting and needless squabbles. Lawyer Mohammed found his match in the UK-trained and equally loquacious lawyer FFK and they turned the political space into one huge fighting ring.
It was not surprising, therefore, that after getting the victory with lies, Lai Mohammed and the APC sustained the lie-lie habit, believing it was worth continuing since PMB was not even in the campaign promises. In 2019, the APC’s mastery of lying was noticeable and they didn’t find any reason to change a winning team.
Instead, more attack dogs were added. They were Festus Keyamo, a Senior Advocate of Nigeria, and the then National Chairman, Comrade Adams Oshiomhole, who came from his organised labour background and felt he was a square peg in a square hole in the attack dog policy of the party. Again, the main opposition PDP joined the APC in raising some attack dogs. In the PDP then, their hands were so filled with willing attack dogs that they had eight campaign spokespersons at a time.
Ahead of the 2023 Presidential election, this undesirable campaign strategy has continued. The APC has again drafted the garrulous SAN, Minister of State for Labour Keyamo to combine with voluble Comrade Oshiomhole not only to shield the APC candidate who is patently politically handicapped but to try and whitewash him for the gullible Nigerian public to see in him as what-is-not.
Again, the PDP has responded to the APC move by appointing easily the most brutal attack dog in the system, Senator Dino Melaye. Even before the campaign kicks off the barking of the dogs is filling the space. They are already engaging themselves and effectively distracting the electorate from the many pitfalls of the dog owner-principals.
In the APC, Comrade Oshiomhole, who was going down politically after his humiliation in the Edo State gubernatorial polls and his ouster from his exalted APC National Chairman position, is visibly excited at his apparent rehabilitation with the appointment as deputy campaign director-general.
It appears that Oshiomhole’s main schedule of duty is to tackle the high-flying Labour Party presidential ticket holder, Peter Obi, and cut him down at all costs. This can be deduced from his exhilaration and eagerness to attack Obi’s high-rising profile.
Oshiomhole may have been drafted to fill the space and reach the ends, and perhaps achieve what journalist Sam Omatseye could not in his hate article in The Nation newspaper of August 1, 2022…condemned by all as dirtying the journalism profession. A dirty-minded write-up that rightly fetched him the ‘Kept Man’ title as a designated hatchet writer.
Donald Friedman, an American novelist, and author of the award-winning book, The Hand before the Eye, certainly had the likes of Omatseye in mind when he said, “Your dog is the ultimate acolyte; he believes you are the very image of God.” As far as Omatseye is concerned a Tinubu is the very image of God and he could break the ceiling just to protect and adore him.
The most unfortunate thing about this attack dog phenomenon is that the public is denied the opportunity of hearing from the candidates they are voting for. The attack dogs shield them and deny the electorate the chance of scrutiny to know what to hold them accountable for. Most of the fabrications from Lai Mohammed on Buhari in 2015 and 2019 for which the people try to hold the President liable were denied as not coming from him directly.
Already, in the current political turf to 2023, the attack dogs of both Tinubu and Atiku have dominated the space with their puerile quarrels that have nothing to do with good governance and development.
Adams Oshiomhole and Keyamo rather than market their principal are busy throwing stones at opponents, challenging Obi who has been busy marketing himself without reference to any of his opponents. But since Obi is not in a contest with Oshiomhole but with Tinubu, he has rightly decided to ignore any attack dogs but waits for their owners who indeed are his challengers. Ditto the PDP attack dog Melaye.
The huge minus of the attack dogs to the system is that they will distract the people and prevent them from raising relevant questions to the candidates. They will shield the candidates and deny the people the opportunity to scrutinise them adequately. They will heat the polity unnecessarily and make no issues occupy and dominate the conversation. This is not good for democracy.